I touched a tarantula’s hairy butt.
I think he was totally offended and he kind of jumped (which absolutely mortified me) but then he just went on with himself.
It wasn’t exactly the way I had planned it.
Every spider I saw I thought was the one. The one in the garage, and in the shed, and then one really unreasonable one discovered in the laundry room who still hasn’t come out from under the washing machine.
So, who would be the selfie spider? None of those guys.
The problem was that I didn’t really know those spiders and we didn’t have any mutual friends or anything. So instead I called the town’s new pet shop and asked if they had spiders I could take a selfie with.
“Well that’s weird, but sure!” the shop owner told me. I get that a lot.
The next day I gathered my family and off we went together for mommy’s spider selfie, because we are all about conquering our fears right now.
So…my selfie was with an enclosed tarantula.
Here it is…
If you can’t tell from the picture, I was totally freaked out. My hand jerked back about five times before I actually touched that spider.
BUT I DID!
Well and here’s the thing: I am still scared of spiders. My spider selfie did not cause me to suddenly embrace all eight legged creatures as friends. What it made me realize, though, is that I can do what needs to be done.
My fear conquering summer is not about becoming totally fearless, but learning to trust God.
Fear builds barriers, while God builds trust.
Some fear is good; next I plan to tackle the dark (and yes I am still scared of the dark) but I certainly will not be wandering around in the oncoming and reportedly damaging storm.
Because being careless doesn’t equal being fearless. I don’t ever plan to pick up a poisonous spider, because I don’t really want to die or get really sick.
I knew this guy was safe, but I was still afraid. Sometimes God calls us to face our fears, and sometimes our loved ones need us to face our fears.
In August I will have a cancer preventative surgery (hysterectomy) and I am really afraid, because I haven’t had anything like that done before.
However, my family needs me to be brave and so I will be.
Sometimes–meaning all the time–we just have to trust God.
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise—in God I trust and am not afraid.–Psalm 56:3-4
I know His plan for me exceeds what I could ever dream of, and fear will hold me back from it.
This doesn’t mean that I think God will rain on my finances or that he will provide me with a life greater than what I already have–because believe me I already know I am blessed.
God’s plan for me is to live for eternity because the place He has prepared for me will exceed anything I can conceive of here. I must be brave enough to follow Him down whatever path He sends me down.
it might be a quick trip (any moment could be our last) or it might be a winding road to Heaven. Either way, I have to understand that this life will go nowhere if I cower down to everything that He asks me to do.
Even if it means touching a hairy tarantula’s butt.